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He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not - How Does Your Cat Show Affection?
By admin on Feb 23, 2008 in cat behavior
Today we’re going to have some fun. How does your kitty show his affection for you? Take this little quiz to find out how much you really know about your cat…
1. If your cat licks you, it means:
a) you taste like a dead mouse.
b) you need a bath.
c) he likes you.
d) your hand lotion reminds him of catnip.
2. Your kitty shows how much he loves you by:
a) peeing in your shoes.
b) sending you emails that say “i luv u.”
c) kneading your stomach and purring.
d) running down to the store and buying you chocolate.
3. When your kitty rubs his head on you, he’s:
a) showing you who’s the boss cat.
b) marking you with his scent to show you belong to him.
c) trying to hypnotize you.
d) sharing his fleas.
4. If your kitty rubs his gums on you, it means:
a) he’s teething.
b) he’s tasting you to see if you’re good to eat.
c) his gums are itchy.
d) he’s putting his scent on you to identify you as his.
5. Your kitty brings you a really cool present, like a dead mouse, because:
a) you’re too little and dumb to take care of yourself, so he has to feed you.
b) he wants to give you something neat.
c) he feels like he’s in a safe place.
d) he knows you won’t eat it, so he’ll get to eat it himself later on, but in the meantime you’ll think he’s a great cat because he gave you a present.
And now for a bonus question! What does it mean when your cat blinks at you?
a) he’s flirting with you.
b) he’s saying “I love you.”
c) he has something in his eye.
d) he’s trying to do a Vulcan mind-meld with you.
OK, now to find out how you did…
1. Why does your cat lick you? Because he likes you, and he shows it by grooming you. Mama cat grooms her kittens by licking them, and kittens learn to associate being licked with the safe secure feeling they have around their mom. If you adopt two kittens who are littermates, they’ll groom each other their whole lives. And when your cat licks you, he’s showing you his affection.
2. Your kitty also shows his love for you by kneading your stomach and purring. When you cat was a kitten, his mama’s purr guided him to her nipples so he could nurse. Kittens learn that mama’s purr means warm milk and a full tummy. And kittens purr back when they’re warm and happy and full of milk.
Kittens knead their mama’s teats to keep that nice warm milk flowing. When your cat kneads you, he’s feeling relaxed and happy. Some cats get so relaxed, they start to drool! I’ve had a couple of cats who did that.
Once your kitten grows into a cat, he still purrs. Cats soothe themselves by purring if they are stressed or upset. If you kitty is sitting in your lap, purring and totally relaxed, his purring probably means that he feels cared for by you, just like he felt cared for by his mama.
3. When you cat rubs his head on you, he’s marking you with his scent. Basically, he’s saying, “We belong together because I smell you on me, and you smell me on you.” He doesn’t know that your sense of smell isn’t as good as his is! Unless he’s just been sprayed by a skunk, you won’t smell a thing.
4. If your feline friend is rubbing his gums on you, he’s marking you as belonging to him.
5. Contrary to what we want to think, your cat’s offering of a dead mouse isn’t really a present. Actually, what he’s saying is that “I’m bringing this here because it’s safe here.” He’s complimenting you by telling you how safe he feels around you.
How did you do? Do you need the bonus question?
Your kitty says “I love you” by blinking. He shows that he trusts you by staring at you, and then blinking his eyes. He’ll open them and then blink a second time, more gently than the first time. Try this if you’re trying to gain a cat’s confidence.
How does YOUR kitty show his affection? Leave a comment and tell us!
16 Comment(s)
By Brennan Kingsland on Feb 23, 2008 | Reply
LOVED this article! It brought back so many happy memories. My husband complained that a cat’s tongue feels like sandpaper and the claws hurt when they knead. After I explained it meant how much the cats loved him, he never complained again.
It’s an honor to be groomed by a cat.
Brennan AKA PuppyLove
P.S. I’m assuming that bringing you a dead snake is also a sign of trust?
Brennan Kingsland’s last blog post..7 Ways to Control Kids on the Bus
By admin on Feb 23, 2008 | Reply
Ha, Brennan, I can beat that one…I had a kitty bring a live snake in the house for me! I had the back door open to get some air. I didn’t have a screen door, so my kitty brought her snack into the bedroom. I didn’t know it was still alive, though!
By Riley & Tiki on Feb 25, 2008 | Reply
We kitties are teaching our dog to be a cat. We rub our heads on him and he has started rubbing his head on us. We both do 1-4, but we’ve never caught a real live dead mouse, so we just bring our toys … and sometimes the dog’s toys.
Riley & Tiki’s last blog post..Kesey is still the best brother
By admin on Mar 3, 2008 | Reply
Hi Riley and Tiki,
Hope you come back to visit often! Teaching your dog to be a cat is an excellent thing to do. I’m glad to hear that you do bring presents to your owner. I’m sure that she probably prefers toys to a real live dead mouse anyway!
Thanks for your comment!
Darlene
By Kim on Apr 10, 2008 | Reply
My cat wold should affection by following me around the house when I left a room he followed me to the next and would just curl up near me. He slept on the foot of my bed every night. He was never a licker or one to purr but as soon as I came home he was there for me at the door. I could call his name and he’d come to me… if I was doing something he had to jump right in between me and whatever it was rather I was writing a paper or on the computer.
By admin on Apr 11, 2008 | Reply
Hi Kim,
Your kitty obviously liked being around you a lot! He had many ways of showing his affection for you. Thanks for sharing!
Darlene
By Gloria on Jul 20, 2008 | Reply
My cat George is a rescued stray who had to be bottlefed. Now he is 5 months old, and cute. However, he still will bite drawing blood without warning - usually the lips are the target. He also wails continuously when I am having a shower, or I am at the sink - he has food and a toy monkey which he always brings to me when he wants a game.
Don’t understand the wail at bathtime - he could wake the dead!!!!!!!!!!!!
By admin on Jul 20, 2008 | Reply
Hi Gloria,
Ouch! Having a cat bite you on the lip has got to hurt! You may want to check out Solutions To Cat Behavior Problems. This ebook was written by a vet in response to questions from clients about cat behavior. It may be helpful to you in figuring out what to do about George.
Thanks for your comment! Good luck with your kitty!
Darlene
By Rachel on Aug 11, 2008 | Reply
i belive these might be ways that my cat show her affection and love for me,
-she follows me around
-she never leaves my side, i could be sitting down for hours and she’ll lay there and sleep intel i move again.
- she licks my hands, hair, and gives me kisses when i put my face close to hers
- she meows when i say or call her name
- she’ll sit by the door if i forget to let her in a certain room and wait intel it is opened for her to get in.
-she dont respond to other peaple when they call her name and rarely lets them touch her with out sniffing there hands first.
- she stares at me alot & everytime i talk to her she shuts her eyes slowly as if she was falling asleep and then opens them again..
im not sure if this is right but i have noticed that when i am away she hardly eats and never leaves my room.
- anddd the last point is that when i was sick she never left the only time she did was to eat n go to the washroom n came right back ;o
By admin on Aug 11, 2008 | Reply
Hi Rachel,
I would say your kitty LOVES you! You’re definitely her favorite person. I’m sure you love her just as much.
Thanks for your comment, and come back again!
Darlene
By Amanda on Aug 25, 2008 | Reply
My husband and I have had Elle a 3 month old calico for a week now. I cannot leave a room without her right at my heels. No matter what I am doing she is right there. When I am going to the bathroom she has to lay on my lap.
The only place she is not permitted is our bedroom because my 7 year old cat doesn’t like her. At night she cries and cries. I try not to give in to her because I notice that as soon as I come out of the bedroom she purrs and plays. As I am typing this she is laying on the desk between my arms cleaning herself. What I find interesting is that we have hd 2 other cats and neither did this to this extreme. I must say… I feel completly loved.
By Lelia on Aug 28, 2008 | Reply
I was reading your article because my 17-yr old, stage 2 FIV, male “puppy” (giant cat) brought me my second “gift” in 3 months last night. I wanted to ensure I responded appropriately with praise and a heap of wet food to distract him while I disposed of the mouse.
I’ve been out of town for almost a month, and it’s nice to see he still loves me.
He too follows me from room to room, meets me outside when he hears my car pull in, kneads my arms and stomach, and will match my nightly tossing and turning to continuously “spoon” me.
It’s great to have unconditional love from such a good friend.
By admin on Aug 29, 2008 | Reply
Hi Amanda,
Elle sounds like she has a slight case of separation anxiety. You’re doing the right thing in ignoring her at night. She’ll stop after a few nights when she sees it doesn’t work. She’s obviously attached to you, and it sounds like you have a long happy life ahead of you!
Lelia, your feline friend is very fond of you, too. Even when you can’t spend as much time as you would like with them, our kitties still love us unconditionally. You’re right, a relationship with a cat is a wonderful thing.
Best wishes,
Darlene
By Christy on Nov 13, 2008 | Reply
My kitten Phelps was a rescued cat; someone tried to drown him when he was a baby but Phelps was a natural swimmer. Hence the name ^_^
My cat is very affectionate, and very very playful. He is in the habit now of bringing his toys onto the couch beside me and leaning on me when he plays. Although, when he gets really excited he wants to play with me instead of the toy and he will wrap his arms around my forearm and start biting at my wrist or fingers as if they are a toy too. oh and his back feet are kicking away at my arm like he does with his toys too.
Is this behavior normal or does he really like me? i’m kinda confused. I have never had a cat before so i have nothing to compare him to.
By Jesseecuh on Dec 5, 2008 | Reply
I read all of these comments about nice cats that show a great deal of continuous love to their owners and I laugh. I don’t laugh because I think it silly, I laugh because I think it’s funny how different my cat really is.
For starters he’s a pretty big tom cat, though I am not sure on his breed/type. He weighs about 23 pounds and we’ve had him for…oh, going on 5 years now. He’s as big as a new born baby…actually longer than my little cousin of 6 months old and larger than my gran’ma’s full grown palmeranian.
With that, he’s always been a grumpy old man. No joke, he is very territorial…which is why we had him diclawed and nutered as soon as we were permitted to. But overall he isn’t a very…friendly cat, to say the least. He’s calmed down now as he’s getting a little older, not so much attacking people as just letting them know he doesn’t want them around or touching “his” things.
Despite being moody, he’s very playful. Which play-fighting with us was the first sign of affection he gave us after the claws were out. He was a very angry kitty for quite a few months on that one. But spending more time with him has brought him to show more affection, but you can’t just go up and expect him to let you pet him or he’ll attack your feet when you leave. He has to be the one to tell you he wants affection and not giving it to him when he demands it will make him cry. Honestly, I’m not realy sure if cats have tearducts, but he whines like there’s no tomorrow. As grumpy as he is he doesn’t like to be left alone for too long and he’ll let you know about it. I have a room in the basement where we keep him and he knows when I’m in there and not paying him any mind. So what does he do? He whines at my door until I come out. The little brat thinks he owns the house too xD
He can be very sweet when he wants to be, even doing the whole grooming and rubbing things with me from time to time. But he loves to sit in my lap while I’m working. I think he’s just cold when he does that, but I want to think he’s doing it for affection. Lol. Well, I love him and the old man better love me as well. I clean his toilet out >.> He better love me.
Heh, did I mention he harfs his food down? I thought cats were suppost to be dainty….but he’s not, my dog is though. :\ odd huh?
By ashley on Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
we have a friend who has a cat, i take care of him while they work, the cat fifa, he kisses me(grooms me) all the time i love it when he does that, its his way of saying i love you to me